I’m in the car. [audience cheering] But she never forgets! Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features. Chris Rock: Bring the Pain (1996) – Transcript February 17, 2018 In his second HBO stand-up special Chris Rock discusses life, relationships, racism, society, politics, and controversial figures such as OJ Simpson, Marion Barry, and even the President -- speaking not only from personal experience but also keen observations. FreeHdFilms. You know, you don’t really gotta try to sell crack, OK? You ain’t hear sh!t ’cause you was doing sh!t! Who’s the guy, Ron Goldman? Find all about Chris Rock: Bring the Pain on Scripts.com! Johnny’s got his own crack house. Man on fire People want to get high. Because if that was Jerry Seinfeld tried with double murder and the only person that found the bloody glove happened to be in the Nation of Islam … Jerry’d be a free man! Yeah. In this classic segment from his 1996 HBO special Bring the Pain, Chris Rock points out behaviors in the black community. anklet like a prisoner … … And every time you leave the house you’ll have to check in: “I’m outside. We don’t know if there’s gonna be a return engagement. Skipped off (???) Free shipping for many products! ‘Cause you’ve got to give every woman like a 7-dick curve. “I’d give your lazy ass one of mines, but you’ll get f*cked up, and get laid off, “And they wouldn’t hire another n i g g e r for ten years!” Sh!t! (???) Are you out of your f*cking mind?! The second HBO stand-up special by Chris Rock. Method Man is credited in the special's closing credits. in Harlem, New York. Good Enough Diploma. “Hey b!tch, stop f*cking! I'm big! “I know you did it, just admit it. get us outta here now! “Let’s work it out!” You know what “work it out” means? “That was all about race.” That sh!t wasn’t about race. Follow. “I prefer syrup!” I’m not making this up! If you’re up at the right hour you can get a VCR for $ 1.50! No matter what you eat down South, they’ve got some pork in it! In a place like this, it could be a lifetime. Legalize it. Crack is not an encyclopedia, not a f*cking vacuum cleaner! ‘Cause some black guy would just kill the president, that’s why! So I went to community college, and I said ??? Boy, you ain’t gonna get no p*ssy until the Bills win the Super Bowl! Whenever Colin Powell is on the news, white people always give him the same compliments. “What is the capital of Zaire?” “I do not know that sh!t!” “Keepin’ it real!” N*ggas love to keep it real! But she does. You're up early, Mato. You know the next man who’ll f*ck your woman. You cheated on her, and now you don’t trust her. Don’t eat no red meat? Sh!t, there’s a reason to kick an old man down a flight of stairs. If O.J. It’s like a civil war is going on between black people and there’s two sides: there’s black people and there’s n*ggas. So I’ve got to come back to commitment. Do you know what they say, “never say never”? © 2021 Scraps from the Loft. “I know you did it, I’ve got it all filmed! What kind of ignorant sh!t is that? Chris Rock: Bring the Pain (TV) es una película dirigida por Keith Truesdell con Chris Rock. The exact same sh!t! And you’re driving to your grandmother’s house and say, “Oh, babe, I’ll make a right turn right here.” “Did you make a right with that b!tch? this is how we do this, FreeHdFilms. Stopping? West Coast! That’s right, if you are starving, a pork chop will save your life! Never learn sh!t about… I still don’t know sh!t about Africa. But you stole my heart|You cheated and lied Just put the money in the books! Colin Powell’s got a better chance of winning the bronze in female gymnastics … … to being the president of the United States. But then your woman got a hold of you, she cut your hair, washed you down, gave you a Life Saver, wiped out the crusts around your eyes … … Now everybody wants to f*ck you! We just have women we haven’t f*cked yet! I’ve got to know this, I’m black, right? Too much food in America, man! What's... East Coast! N*ggas love to not know. is bullsh!t. You old drunk. Because n*ggas will break into your house. Ten places … there ain’t no black people in Minnesota! But you’ve got to think about life in the long term. Why, why do you want to know? Stop f*cking! A n*gga will brag about some sh!t a normal man just does. Do you know why you gotta settle down eventually? 1997 Chris Rock: Bring the Pain 1999 The Chris Rock Show Mejor especial de variedades, música o comedia 1997 Chris Rock: Bring the Pain Mejor especial de variedades, música o comedia 2009 Chris Rock: Kill the Messenger: Premios Grammy: Mejor álbum hablado de comedia 1998 Roll with the New 2000 Bigger & Blacker Mejor álbum de comedia. Good, good, good, good, good. Why, why do you want to know? But I want some p*ssy payment!” Am I wrong? She can go: “Two.” And you’re like: “Two? I guess she’s like: “I gotta get some extra cheese on my waffles (??? Do it for his country. N*ggas are just ignorant, love being ignorant and are singing about ignorance! What you eat has got sh!t to do with who you are as a person, ok? Though every time you see welfare they always show black people. cause she’s gonna lie. Don’t vote for crack, vote for smack!” Marion Barry… come on, how are you gonna tell little kids to not get high… when their mayor is on crack? Anybody can give you a reason to hit him. Just be happy you’re …. HBO Can’t cheat! on the Sunset Strip We can hold nothing back. Because men we only have one responsibility: knock it out, that’s it. You know, what if they figured out a way to bring you back from the dead? White people don’t ????. How the f*ck do you expect him to sound, dirty motherf*cker? “I’ll kill you, girl! I wasn’t good? I won't let you down, son. wasn’t famous, he’d be in jail right now. Nooooo, noooo a book!”, I’m tired of this sh!t, man. You’d better recognize … Sh!t, I don’t even have a Ferrari, but if I saw somebody driving in my Pinto … … That sh!t would blow like in the Godfather! If you ask a woman how many guys she f*cked, she’s not gonna tell you how many guys she f*cked. I don’t do no drugs. "Red Rock West" (OFFICERS YELLING INDISTI... 1 Because you never know … That’s right, they get rid of their girlfriends every 6 months! “On the first day a welfare my true love gave to me” “I wish you a merry Welfare and a happy Foodstamps!” What the f*ck is going on? Come on, Spicer. What, he had a stroke the other day? When a woman is with a man she knows a 100% ain’t gonna hit her, oh! This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using viewings of Chris Rock Bigger And Blacker. I’ve got to recycle the p*ssy! Bullsh!t! Run!” “The media’s there!” Sad, sad, sad! “What about me? If we had a black vice president right now, I could not have waited to kill the president! “I ain’t never been to jail!” What do you want, a cookie?! I heard some song the other day: “It’s the first of the month …” N*ggas are singing welfare carols! What the f*ck are you gonna do?” Then she says something… they say the wrong thing, something like: “That’s why your mother’s a b!tch!” And she knows she went too far! And eating cereal right now. You got off lucky! You can’t go to a movie the first week it comes out, why? What blood’s got to do with it?” (reference to Tina Turner’s “What’s Love Got To Do With It”) That’s the big thing now, domestic abuse! [Chris Rock: Bring the Pain, 1996] Parenting A bunch of girls say, ‘You don’t need no man to help you raise no child’ … shut the fuck up with that bullshit! is an All Star squad. Comedy gold: Chris Rock's Bring the Pain An eight-minute riff during this show saw Rock take on a controversial subject close to home – and it made him a star Leo Benedictus. I tossed the salad, child!” No, I do not think it’s cool to hit women, I do not do that sh!t. (GRUNTS) Ok? Home of the Million Man March! It ain’t all black people on welfare, sh!t. That guy they met at the club … The guy they f*cked in the club that night, or that time they f*cked Bobby Brown! The drug dealers offer: “Hey man, you want some smoke, you want some smoke?” You say “No”, that’s it! you old cur's son! I would never ever hit a woman in my life, never! Don’t be mistaken thinking there was some guy returning the glasses, right? 41:47. I’m gonna let you go and ??? O.J. What? It ain’t us, it’s the media. Black people are 10% of the f*cking population, Black people are in New York, DC, LA, Chicago, Atlanta … like, ten places, ok? Y... We can't hold out much longer, sir! “Put the dick down! I will not!” “I will read! What are you talking about? And you know that. That’s right. What the f*ck was she eating for 4 grand a month? (Texas) That’s right, a prenuptial agreement. prize: nothing! But if you make 30 000 … and your wife wants 15 … … You might have to kill her! “Ok, you go from that corner to that corner. That’s right, I’ve got to recycle the p*ssy! Why?! I'm strong! Because that’s what a relationship is all about: recycling, keeping it new. What was the big thing this year? “Hey man, I got out of school, I got my master’s!” “So what, b!tch? It ain’t us, it’s the media! So you know that boat ride was really long! I like women. Be-bop-bo-peek-a-boo, I hate n i g g e r s! Get the f*ck out of here, man! You, like, threw up back here with And he shall betray you! Chris Rock's 'Bring the Pain' Oct 15, 2018 | 56m 26s | tv-14 d,l Comedian and Emmy® Award winner W. Kamau Bell (“United Shades of America”) steps behind the camera to direct this film about how Chris Rock changed the face of comedy with his seminal 1996 special “Bring the Pain.” I'm bitchin', great hair Colin Powell can’t be president! You’re gonna get… I don’t care who you are, you’re 007 you’re gonna get caught! You just gave her a get-some-dick free card! Men don’t settle down. We’ve got so much food in America we’re allergic to food. There is a lot of uncontrolled ‘Cause n*ggas are shooting at the screen! (A malt liquor) You know what they say, “There’s no reason to ever hit a woman.” Sh!t! Sh!t! East Coast! But times have changed. She’s paid that big-ass alimony, he ain’t scored a touch-down in twenty years … That’s right, should have had a prenup. ANNOUNCER: (ON PA) You can’t do sh!t without some ignorant n*ggas f*cking it up! Hope I'm|the one you pick to cheer! “Hey, this is a good movie, this movie’s so good I gotta bust a cap in here!” Hey, I love black people, but I hate n*ggas! What the f*ck is the world coming to? Legalize, man. Then women, women will go at you, they don’t give a f*ck. But you know, if you’re black, you get more respect coming out of jail than school. Ow! Now what’s Martin Luther King? ‘Cause I got caught out there ????. Required fields are marked *. and scream Ladies and gentlemen, They are chasing me. What are you talking about? Boy, I wish they’d let me join the Ku Klux Klan! “Oh, no, I am in the Friend Zone!”. Grabado en Washington DC, el cómico afroamericano Chris Rock, habla sobre las drogas, las mujeres, OJ Simpson, y las diferencias entre los "niggas" y la gente negra. Now we’ve got the war on drugs. this is how we do it! When you were single, nobody was calling your ass up! INT. Fuck! But I would shake the sh!t out of a woman! https://www.thefamouspeople.com/profiles/chris-rock-30184.php Sh!t, I want to eat there! Crack is everywhere, crack everywhere … you know what they say? Up! I'm sexy, I'm cute Chris Rock - Bigger and Blacker by Various DVD $18.49. Big deal, you ain’t starving. I do not think it’s cool, I never hit a woman in my life and would never hit a woman. What are you talking about? How did he get the ticket? Black people too happy, white people too mad. For some sh!t that you’re supposed to do! “What’s wrong with you? No, it is not. Fill it up with a little gasoline, dead llama beans and then suck it. “I’m counting these rocks, biatch!” You can have a master’s degree, n*ggas don’t care. You start thinking: “I guess it’ll be all right … “… If I just say I did it! Just be happy you’re f*cking her now. N... (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING) vocabulary in this movie! Then they start going, “It’ll be all right if you just say you did it. Who’s more racist, black people or white people? A whole two w... ( Hoofbeats ) Yes, you can get a job, “Get a job holding dicks. About Bring the Pain "Bring the Pain" is a song recorded by the rap artist Method Man. A SILHOUETTED MAN in front of mirror dons his Marine dress blues. It was a controversial skit. Decorated in Carol Brady chic. You can’t do sh!t! You can’t go to no college with no GED! This stand up was the stand up performance that made Chris Rock a big comedian superstar. Chris Rock: Bring the Pain is a television special that premiered on HBO on June 1, 1996, starring comedian Chris Rock.This was Rock's second special for the network, following 1994's Big Ass Jokes as part of HBO Comedy Half-Hour.Rock was already a well-known comedian, but Bring the Pain made him one of the most popular comedians in the United States. F*ck you, f*ck you, f*ck you, f*ck you!” And the man’s like, “How the f*ck did we get here?” I’ll tell you how you got there. Just let me know when you're ready. All rights reserved. listen to your punk ass? Real dumb! “I’m right next to you. Only in America we say some bullsh!t like “red meat can kill you.” We’ve got too much food in America. Sh!t, if I had a choice right now between the electric chair and tossing a salad … I’d be like: “So where are you plugging in? Puedes ver Chris Rock: Bring the Pain, película completa en nuestra guía cinematográfica - Esta película forma parte de la saga completa de Chris Rock (1996, 1999, 2004, 2008). No! “Now I will have to kill him to get my eyes back!”. You just don’t do it. “Mom, I’m back! “Oh, you think you are ??? What do you mean, “Red meat will kill you”? “They’re chasing me. I think they should just legalize crack. be the ce... 1 Now they’ve got some sh!t, they’re trying to get rid of welfare. They’ll send your ass to Hardee’s. Sh!t, Ted Koppel ain’t never took sh!t from me! Wanna cheat? But before you can settle down, you’ve got to get over this other sh!t … That’s right, ’cause every man’s got a choice to make. You ain’t getting no p*ssy for a long time! And so they’ve got to ration out their p*ssy. Failed. “Are you crazy? I'm everything you're not You cheated on your wife. Cause anybody in a community can go, “crackheads, prostitutes, drug dealers, come on in!” Community college is like a disco with books. Chris Rock: Bring the Pain is a television special that premiered on HBO on June 1, 1996 starring comedian Chris Rock.This was Rock's second special for the network, following 1994's Big Ass Jokes as part of HBO Comedy Half-Hour.Rock was already a well-known comedian, but Bring the Pain made him one of the most popular comedians in the United States. Women, you know, they can be good, but sometimes they’re trying not to be too good, you know what I mean? Sh!t, a book is like kryptonite to a n*gga! Pig feet. It is the most beautiful thing in the world. A zone I don’t f*ck with, ok? They all go: “Oh, the jury was so stupid.” Get the f*ck out of here, man! You get no respect coming out of school. You will never see no black vice president. Did she toss your salad? Now a pork chop is your friend! I'm hot! “Crack is destroying the black community.” “Crack is destroying the ghetto.” Yeah, like the ghetto was so nice before crack! Just ask n*gga a question. worl... - Are you ready to do this? “And they need your help!” No, man! “He speaks so well …” What are you talking about, “he speaks so well” What voice were you looking to come out of his mouth? [Announcer] Live from the Takoma Theatre in Washington D.C. Are you ready? N*ggas have! They say that sh!t like everybody had at least a mansion, a yacht and a swimming pool … … then crack came by and dried it all up! Be signing autographs, “97/KY” Here you go! Sh!t, even if they had a death penalty, what would happen? I’m thirty years old, ain’t nobody ever sold me drugs. I am tired of n*ggas, man! Larry the Cable Guy is back to Git R Done. : “Yes, we won, we won! Life is long. Don’t believe the hype. Get the f*ck out of here! I'm ... Like, wow. What are you talking about? You know what the first part of payback is? Sh!t, some guys have got to go to rehab not to cheat! Last day of school! The guy they f*cked in Jamaica: “That’s another country, it doesn’t count!” “I thought we were just talking about domestic dicks!”, Women got it good. And then the guy says, ‘Why must you go through all that, why not just oral sex? Pornography ( Curb Your Enthusiasm And Chris Rock Bigger And Blacker ) The juGGaKNot Empire. If I’ve got a baby, is new p*ssy going to teach him how to read? Pick up the phone, You was f*cking a cracker-ass cracker ?? I finally made it! What about the good things that crack has brought into our minds that were not there before? - Fantastic!|- I'm sorry. “I know you did, just admit it.” And if that don’t work, the woman will get psychological on your ass ???. Chris Rock Total Blackout: The Tamborine Extended Cut – Transcript, Bo Burnham: Words, Words, Words (2010) – Transcript, Vir Das: Outside in – The Lockdown Special (2020) – Transcript, Larry the Cable Guy – Remain Seated (2020) – Transcript. She’ll be crying on his shoulder: “I can’t believe this happened, I am so glad you’re here …” That’s right! What's up, London? Comedian Chris Rock named his 1996 tour and television special "Bring the Pain" after this song. I would never hit a woman. Were they, like, on heroin? Africa’s like a 35-hour flight. Sh!t, if I would be in jail guys would come at me: “Yo, Chris, Chris, yo, man! “Ok? Martin Luther King stood for non-violence. Find many great new & used options and get the best deals for Chris Rock - Bring the Pain (DVD, 2002) at the best online prices at eBay! I’m hopping. Do you know who I really feel for, who I feel for more than anybody else? Vice-President … you know what? We need the toss-salad men in school! Hey, you go to a restaurant, you’re accustomed to eating. She’s like: “You can’t.” Yes, you can go too f*cking far! Al... What's up? People want to get high. No, no, no! How does if feel to Stacee Jaxx and Ar... CAMP ROCK The war on drugs is bullsh!t, it is the way to get more motherf*ckers in jail, that’s all it is … yes! As soon as you get to the door she’s like, “No, no! F*ck the country, sh!t! N*ggas always want some credit for some sh!t they’re supposed to do. had bought for her. They interviewed a brother and ??? This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Down To Earth. Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube. ??? And you never know when she’s going to cash it in! Put them in your books! I will learn to read!”. “Oh, they’re gonna take our sh!t!” Sh!t, a black man who’s got two jobs, goes to work every day, hates a n*gga on welfare. So let me get this straight, I can make four years in six hours. ” The guy is like: “Toss my salad? Welcome to the famous Bourbon Room No matter what she says. The cops are chasing me. You know what happens when you f*ck around your woman? Two? Allergic to food! “Ok, I’m gonna f*ck him now, but I won’t suck his dick for two weeks.” “All right, I’m gonna suck his dick now, but I won’t lick his balls till next month.” “All right, I’m gonna lick his balls now, but I won’t lick his ass till next year!”. That’s right! The problem is … The reason jails are so crowded ’cause life is f*cked up too! Do you know why I want them to legalize crack?

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